How did you and your spouse come to understand that adoption was right for your family?
After almost 10 years of struggling with infertility we decided to start listening to God and He opened doors quickly and easily, making the path He wanted us on obvious.
Share your thoughts and feelings on open adoption, both before and after the adoption.
I was terrified and reluctant at first. Kenneth was too. Once we learned properly about it, God opened our hearts to it and we felt it was the best decision for our child to be in an open adoption. Now that my son is two years old, I stand firmly behind open adoption as being the healthiest plan for everyone. I absolutely love his birth family and it brings me so much comfort knowing who they are, how they are doing, and how much they love Asher.
Share about your thoughts and feelings towards your child’s birth parents.
Asher’s birth mom is the most selfless mother I know. She is wonderful. She gives me the space I need to be Asher’s mother, yet she is present enough to let Asher and I know how much she loves us.
What are some of the lessons you learned through adoption?
You must sacrifice your comfort for the well-being of your child. Adoption is the Gospel. God chooses your children, biological or not. Love multiplies; it does not divide.
Share about a testimony of Christ’s love and faithfulness seen in your adoption story.
No matter how much loss we experienced leading up to adoption, no matter how hard the wait was for our family to grow, Christ never abandoned us. He always stood by our side patiently waiting for us to turn to Him and trust Him. Once we finally decided to lay parenthood at His feet, He moved us quickly through the process and the waiting was over. He is forever faithful.
What was your experience with Aggieland Pregnancy Outreach during the process (before adopting, at the hospital, and following the adoption)?
APO is more than we could ever ask for. The support was like nothing I have ever experienced. The whole process was made so easy, even the mountain of paperwork. Everything is so organized and made so easy. Where the support really came well beyond my imagination was when my son actually arrived. Unknowing to all of us, our son was born with a heart defect that changed the course of our plans and required us to await a major heart surgery. APO stayed by our side, supporting us, loving us, praying for us and it never stopped and two years later it still hasn’t stopped. In addition, when my husband unexpectedly passed away 2 weeks after Asher was born APO believed in me and supported me as a single adoptive mom. Though this was not the way I saw parenthood AT ALL, they have supported me all the way through this trying journey and I have no doubt that will continue for the rest of our lives. Katie has been more than just our case worker, she has become family and I will forever be thankful to her and the entire team at APO.
What are some ways in which you help your child understand their adoption story?
He is too young to understand, but he is not too young to be told. I tell Asher of his birth family and his brave birth mom Amanda and how much they all love him. I show him pictures of his birth sister. My hope is that there won’t be a time in his life that he does not know his story. He will always remember being told his story from the beginning of his memories.
Would you like to share any other information that might benefit others in their understanding of adoption?
Your understanding of adoption is probably filled with stereotypes and misunderstandings. I urge you to dive into the bible and learn of your own adoption so you can begin to understand the love and sacrifice of earthly adoption.