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Our adoption counselors have attempted to answer some common questions women ask about adoption. Obviously, there are many more. If you have other questions, please don’t hesitate to call, text, or email us. We’ll be happy to talk with you.
Incidentally, we use phrases like, “place your baby” or “make an adoption plan” instead of phrases like, “give away your baby” or “put up your baby for adoption.” We give up or give away possessions. Babies are not possessions. They’re tiny humans. We think it’s important to choose words that show how important and how valuable babies are and the importance of your decision.
It’s a decision that should never be entered into lightly. However, along with the pain, there is also joy. The joy of seeing your child in a healthy place both physically and emotionally and the joy of knowing your child is loved by both his birth family and adoptive family.
When birthparents carefully choose an adoptive family, they are showing responsibility by providing the safe and nurturing environment they want for their child. For a woman to place her baby in the arms of another is one of the most painful acts of selflessness there is. She can only do so out of ultimate love for her child.
What were the unique circumstances in your life at that particular time that led you to the decision for adoption? Write out your story while the emotions are still fresh. The beauty of open adoption is you will have lots of time to develop a wonderful relationship with your child and their adoptive family before you have to explain anything.
Adoptive parents are required to go through an extensive screening process before they are permitted to adopt a child. We look for couples with a sincere love for children and a desire to point their children to Christ. Once that child is in their arms, the amazing bonding begins as it does for biological parents.
Many birthparents have regular visits with their child and their adoptive family. Your child need never doubt. He or she can have their questions answered and truly see the loving act of adoption. They can have the freedom to love both their adoptive parents and their birth parents.
Adopted adolescents exhibit more self-esteem and self-confidence, and feel more secure in their families than children from single-parent families.
Adopted adolescents experience depression less than children of single parents and they are less likely to abuse alcohol and engage in theft, vandalism, group fighting, and weapon use.
Adopted children do better academically and have a better economic situations than children from single-parent homes.
Moses: Jocabed found an adoptive home for her son, Moses, with the daughter of the Pharaoh of Egypt. Moses’ life was in danger when his mother placed him in a basket and floated him down the river. She grieved her loss, but her heroic act allowed Moses to be raised in the palace as the adopted son of the Pharaoh’s daughter. His life in the palace prepared him to be the leader of God’s people, the Israelites (Exodus 2:10).
Samuel: Hannah committed her son, Samuel, to the Lord’s service after he was weaned (around age 3 or 4). Samuel grew up in the temple with the priest named Eli as his father. Hannah took new clothes to him every year. Samuel became a great leader for the nation of Israel (I Samuel 1).
Jesus: God provided an earthly father, Joseph, for Jesus. God told Joseph to take Mary as his wife and to name the child. Naming a child was the awesome responsibility of the father. Joseph fully and completely assumed the role of Jesus’ earthly father (Matthew 1:18-25).
Christians: God, our Heavenly Father, established the institution of the family and the importance of fatherhood. He has declared Himself to be the Heavenly Father of those who call upon His name. The Bible says, “…but you have received the spirit of adoption as sons, by which we cry out, “Abba (daddy), Father” (Romans 8:15).